Last Friday we learned that we must humbly display Godly sorrow when we are confronted with sin in our life. But there’s another lesson about reconciliation from Second Corinthians chapter seven. It deals with our attitude when we are the one doing the correcting in someone else’s life.
It’s easy for us to take pride in our position when we know we are right, and then impose shame onto the person who is wrong. Our pride leads to intentionally making the other person feel little and worthless. But we must not correct the wrong in others from that position of pride.
Galatians 6:1 says, “Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted.” When we respond to another person’s sin without understanding the pain they are in we are putting ourselves in a position to sin because of pride.
Paul wanted the hurt in the Corinthian people to last only long enough to bring them back to Christ. Pride seeks prolonged pain. Love seeks repentance and reconciliation. It would be easy for us in our sinful flesh to hope the hurt endures long enough to teach them a good lesson. Paul knew that would be our natural tendency when he contrasted that attitude with the heart of love in First Corinthians 13. He said, “Love does not delight in seeing evil done to another.” The true heart of love, while needing to correct wrong, feels the pain caused by the correction, and hopes change happens quickly.
Reconciliation only happens when repentance is present. Paul repented – not for writing the letter, but for the pain the letter caused. It was that spirit that proved to the people at Corinth that he truly loved them and desired what was best for them. As a result, they were led to repentance and a reconciled relationship with God and each other.
Each one of us is somewhere in this process in our own lives. We are either being corrected or we are having to correct another person. If you are being corrected, crucify pride, and let Godly sorrow bring you to repentance so reconciliation can happen. If you are doing the correcting, do it with compassion that feels the pain of the person needing to confess. Let us not sin while we are in the middle of correcting sin.
As far as the Biblical record indicates, the Apostle Paul wrote more letters to the church in the city of Corinth than to any other church. A careful reading of the two letters we have in the Bible reveals that there were at least two other letters he also wrote. One of those letters ,which we do not have but is referred to in Second Corinthians, was, by Paul’s own admission, pretty harsh. He was having a hard time getting people of that church to stop their sinning, and to stop bringing that sin into the church. There came a time when he had to get firm and forceful with them. Paul was acting righteously. He was fulfilling God’s call upon his life. The people had made their own choices that brought out the wrath of God against their sin, and Paul was the messenger. What Paul did was justified. How he felt about it teaches us a lot about reconciliation.
As you read the seventh chapter of 2 Corinthians – and I encourage you to do so – you will discover the love and compassion Paul had in his heart for the people he had to correct. After writing the letter of rebuke to them, he immediately felt sorrow over how it was going to affect the people he loved so much. Even though he had the right to write, he also had the heart to hurt. The New Living Translation puts Paul’s words in verse 8 this way – “I was sorry at first, for I know it was painful to you for a little while.” That’s the kind of heart attitude we all need if we are going to see God reconcile relationships.
Far too many Christians bring a spirit of pride into their relationships which says, “I know I’m right and I expect them to come to me and repent.” That certainly wasn’t Paul’s attitude. Paul knew he was right, but his pride never kept him from feeling the pain he was causing by being right. We get so wrapped up in the story of our own life that we stop caring about the stories being lived out by others. We especially seem to not care how our story is having a negative effect on their story. That uncaring spirit is especially magnified when we convince ourselves that we are not to blame for how they feel. Yet true reconciliation is only possible if the one in the right cares about the one in the wrong more than they care about their “rightness”, just as God the Father did for us when we were in our sin.
The correction of sin in any of our lives is painful because all sin is the prideful expression of self. It hurts to have self accused of being wrong. We take it as an attack against our value. We usually lash back at the one doing the correcting, trying to restore some self-respect. That is what concerned Paul when he said he understood the pain he had caused them. He was afraid they would lash back at him rather than be led to repentance and reconciliation.
Here’s the lesson for today: we must not react in a prideful way when someone tries to correct a wrong in our lives. We must respond as Paul said the people of Corinth did. Look at what he says about them. “I am not sorry that I sent that severe letter to you, though I was sorry at first, for I know it was painful to you for a little while. Now I am glad I sent it, not because it hurt you, but because the pain caused you to repent and change your ways. It was the kind of sorrow God wants his people to have, the kind that leads us away from sin and results in salvation. There’s no regret for that kind of sorrow. But worldly sorrow, which lacks repentance, results in spiritual death.”
That’s incredible. That’s how reaching out to bring repentance results in reconciliation. That’s the kind of sorrow God wants all His people to have when they are confronted with sin in their lives. Be humble. Accept responsibility. Confess your sin. Be reconciled to God and others. Let’s put that attitude into practice.
2 Corinthians 5:19-20 “And God gave us this wonderful message of reconciliation. So we are Christ’s ambassadors.”
Once upon a time…I’ve always wanted to start a devotional that way.
Once upon a time there was a man living a prosperous life in a distant land. Serving him in his household was a slave to whom much responsibility had been entrusted. Then one day, in an effort to not only be free but to be wealthy as well, the slave stole from his master and ran away. He travelled to the capital of the kingdom and while there he met a man of God. As their friendship developed, the slave became a true believer in Jesus Christ.
The man of God knew what had to be done – the slave had to return to his original master. He must confess his sin and seek forgiveness and reconciliation. He was filled with fear. How would he ever be able to convince his former master that he was different now? What if his master would not forgive him and instead throw him in prison for his crime?
The man of God began to encourage him to be willing to suffer for his faith. It was powerful teaching because it was being backed up by personal experience. You see, the man of God was currently under arrest for his faith in Jesus Christ. He could testify to the sufficiency of God’s grace to endure any suffering that comes as a result of serving Jesus as Lord. So, the slave agreed that he would go back.
Sitting in the room with the man of God was another man who had been very active in missionary work. He remembered the trouble they had when they had been together on a mission trip. He had deserted them and returned home before the trip was over. Then he had the nerve to come back with his cousin – a dear and trusted friend of the man of God – and want to go on another mission trip. The man of God refused to consider it and had such a sharp argument with the cousin that they broke their friendship and went their separate ways. Now, years later, here they were in the same room again – the man of God and the deserter. All because the cousin had not given up on their relationship and had reached out to begin the process of reconciliation.
As the man of God looked across the room and considered that restored relationship, he knew what he had to do. He would write a letter to the former master of the slave, and appeal to his spiritual understanding of God’s love. He knew the decision the former master had made for Christ years earlier. In fact, the man of God had visited the church he attended where he lived. He knew of the man’s faith and was especially impressed with the testimony of the man’s love for other believers. So a letter was composed. He usually had someone else write his letters for him as he dictated because his eyesight was so bad. But this time, because it was so important, he wrote the letter in his own handwriting. He appealed to the master on the basis of love, and gave testimony to the salvation and service of the former slave. He admitted that at one time the slave was useless to him because of his sin, but that now, in Christ, all that is forgiven and he has proven himself useful to the work of God. He even went so far as to volunteer to repay any debt that the master was still holding to the account of the slave.
He looked across the room again at the one who had been a deserter, and then he added one more line to the letter. He told the master that the deserter was present, and that he was now fully restored to relationship as a brother and fellow worker in the Lord’s work. Then he closed the letter by saying, “The grace of the Lord Jesus be with your spirit.”
He knew it was all about grace. He knew that this kind of reconciliation could only happen if God’s grace overwhelms our natural instinct for justice. He himself had dealt with that issue with the deserter some time previously. He had learned that it’s more important to reach out than it is to prove who was right. In fact, it’s in giving up the right to be right that we will discover true reconciliation. His letter was asking the master to do the same by the grace of God.
As the man of God finishes the letter, he looks around the room and sees another faithful brother in Christ. He decides to send him back to the master with the slave as another testimony to the slave’s spiritual renewal. He seals up the letter, hands it to his fellow worker, and he and the slave leave the capital city for the long journey to the home town of the prosperous master. When they arrive, the letter is delivered.
That’s it. The story ends there. We don’t know how the master responded to the letter. We don’t know what happened to the slave. Sounds like the kind of ending I hate at a movie. But none of that is ultimately important. What is significant for us to know is that we are all responsible to reach out to seek the reconciliation of brothers and sisters in Christ when relationships have been broken for any reason.
Barnabas did it with the Apostle Paul when John Mark had deserted them on a mission trip.
The Apostle Paul did it for Onesimus when he had stolen and run away from his master Philemon.
You may have had it done for you by someone who understood the gift of reconciliation that can be given to those who are suffering from the pain of separation.
Now I urge you to do the same for others. Be a minister of reconciliation.
We left off yesterday after learning that Jesus demands reconciliation to others before He accepts our acts of worship. We discovered that truth in Matthew 5:23-24where Jesus says, “Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift.”
Prior to teaching this truth, Jesus had spoken about the relationship between thoughts and actions. He said murder makes us subject to judgment, and then states that anger expressed in sinful behavior to another person makes us subject to the same judgment as murder. After telling us that the attitudes of our heart are equally significant to our actions, he reveals the truth about our responsibility to reconcile to those with bad attitudes towards us. If you know that your brother feels this way towards you – that he has something against you that is causing him to act sinfully towards you, you are responsible to go to him and make it right before you come and worship God. It is arrogant to come before God and worship when we know that someone else is in danger of God’s judgment because of how they feel about us. Jesus says that until we are right with one another God does not want our offerings of worship.
There is yet another lesson here. We are told to “go and be reconciled to your brother.” Jesus does not say to go and attempt to be reconciled. We are not let off the hook just because we claim to have tried our best. That may apply to a person who does not know Jesus Christ and is not our brother, but it doesn’t apply to brothers in Christ. There is never to be an unreconciled relationship in the body of Christ.
Sound idealistic? Yes, but maybe that’s because we haven’t really taken the words of Jesus seriously enough. Maybe it’s because we are still participating in the blame game. Maybe it’s because we believe Jesus excuses our human weakness and doesn’t really expect His words to be considered as absolute truth. Maybe it’s because we just don’t want to try. Whatever the reason, I believe Jesus intends for His body, the church, to be the living example of people who are reconciled to God by modeling true reconciliation with each other.
I can’t tell you when it happened, or even how it happened, but one day I received a phone call from my brother that proved it had happened. You remember the story from yesterday about the fights I would have with this brother, right? I was finishing my first year of college and he was preparing to graduate from high school. He called to ask if he could be my roommate in the dorm for the next year. We were reconciled. I wish I could tell you the exact steps we took to get that way, but I can’t. But I can tell you about forgiveness, and I’ll do that tomorrow. For today, take a fresh look at your broken relationships. Eliminate the need to place blame. Initiate contact. Go and be reconciled. It is your responsibility before God.
I have no idea what started the fight. In fact, there had been a series of fights. One day we went to our bedroom, locked the door, and began slugging it out. I had thrown him on the bed and was in the middle of a flying leap from my bed to his when his feet came up into my midsection. He flipped me right over his head. The problem was that the bed was next to the wall, and my head went through the sheetrock. I missed going through the second story window by just inches. The fight stopped for a while as we developed a plan to cover the hole. But it wasn’t over. Days later I attacked him with some horrible words, and as he tried to punch me I ran from the house. He locked the doors. I found an open window. He closed the window on me while I was halfway through and began pounding on my back. I soon discovered that I was never going to be able to best my brother at anything – until I discovered golf.
So what do you think? Based on the facts of the story as told above, which one of us had the responsibility to go to the other and seek reconciliation? I’ll wait a moment while you review the case and try to decide which of us was to blame……
OK, enough time. I need to tell you that this was a trick. While the story is true in every detail, it’s a trick because in God’s eyes responsibility for reconciliation has nothing to do with who’s to blame. If it did, we would never be able to be saved and reconciled to God because in our sin we would never seek the One who is sinless. God’s model of reconciliation is for the One in the right to seek out the one in the wrong. Time spent determining blame is wasted time that prolongs the pain of separation.
Look closely at today’s Scripture verses.
Matthew 5:23-24 “Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift.”
Do you see any mention of blame? I don’t. I see a person who knows that there is a problem between himself and a brother, but we have no indication of who was at fault. All we see is that any attempt to declare yourself right with God in worship is invalid if we are not right with one another.
If we look at the context of these words of Jesus, we see something very important. They are taken from what we now call the Sermon on the Mount, and Jesus is teaching the people that there is a higher standard than the law by which we are to live. His first illustration of this is with the commandment “Do not murder.” Everyone listening to him agreed that this was the law. But Jesus carries the law to its fullest meaning when He says, “…anyone who murders will be subject to judgment. But I tell you that anyone who is angry with his brother will be subject to judgment.” It is at this point that Jesus says “Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift.”
Chew on that for today. Digest it. Let it affect your thinking and your actions. Then come back tomorrow for more.
I remember early one morning, on my way to the office, I stopped at Great Harvest Bread Store when my son worked there when he was a part-time youth pastor. I arrived before they opened and he let me in. He had just taken his latest creation out of the oven – S’mores scones. They only made 20 of them as a test. They were filled with crushed graham crackers and chocolate chips and oozing with melted marshmallow. He gave me a half of one to try, and it was delicious.
What would a S’mores scone be like without marshmallows? Or chocolate? Or graham crackers? Leave any one of the ingredients out and it would not be a S’mores scone.
That’s how I’m beginning to understand reconciliation. Ephesians 1 is an ingredient list for the recipe of reconciliation. You hopefully spent some time over the weekend in that chapter as you were instructed. Here’s my ingredient list:
God chose us.
God determined to adopt us as His sons and heirs.
God has lavishly bestowed His glorious grace on us through Jesus Christ.
God has redeemed us.
God has forgiven us.
God has made His will known to us.
God has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ.
Leave any one of the ingredients out and it could no longer be called reconciliation. Today let’s look at God’s decision to choose us to be reconciled. True reconciliation begins with the sovereign choice of the One in the right to select and pursue the ones in the wrong.
Before I stopped at the bread store, I needed gas in my car. I stopped at the station where I had just started getting my fuel back then, and I went inside to grab a cup of coffee. The first time I ever filled up at this station I went inside to meet the owner. I chose to make a connection with him. I discovered he has owned this little station for many years. I asked him his name, and every time I go there I call him by name. We started talking about the price of heating our homes, and as we somewhat lamented the costs, I noticed that he was not really complaining. I then made this statement – “I’m so glad that God has promised to supply all of our needs so we don’t need to worry. He will never leave us or forsake us.” He responded by saying, “Isn’t that the truth?” We made a connection. I told him to have a blessed day, and he told me the same, and I left.
This may be very over-simplified, but it helps me to understand and trust the loving heart of God in choosing me. He desires that none should perish in their sin, and that all should come to repentance. He chose to connect with me, and to give me the choice of my free will to connect with Him. As a result, we have been reconciled, which would not be possible if He had not first chosen to connect with us. Praise God!
Unreconciled relationships probably exist in your life because you have not chosen to connect with the one who has wronged you. You have left out the first ingredient of the recipe for reconciliation. What will you do about it?
If we are going to truly understand the marvel of reconciliation, we must wrap our minds around the amazing concept of forgiveness. Here’s one of my favorite Bible passages describing what God did when He reconciled me to Himself in Christ.
Ephesians 1:3-8 “Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ. For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love he predestined us to be adopted as his sons through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will—to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves. In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace that he lavished on us with all wisdom and understanding.”
WOW! Let’s break that down. Here’s what God did for us in our salvation:
He blessed us in His presence with every spiritual blessing in Christ. That means that when God sees us from His throne, our standing with Him is the same as Christ’s.
He chose us. He initiated the whole plan to bring us into relationship with Himself, and to call us holy and blameless.
He determined to adopt us. We are joint heirs of all things in eternity with Jesus Christ.
He has lavishly bestowed His glorious grace on us through Jesus Christ. He will never count your sins against you and He will freely grant you everything He has promised.
He has redeemed us. We are bought with the price of His Son’s blood, and that price is non-refundable. We are eternally secure.
He has forgiven us. Forgiven of everything that contradicts Him, so there need never be anything between us.
My heart is overwhelmed with joy as I think that God, based on the work of Jesus Christ on the cross, can and will forgive us when we humbly confess our sin, and will restore us to perfect relationship with Himself. That, my friends, is truly awesome.
I challenge you to takes some extra time this weekend to look up Ephesians 1:3-8 for yourself and study everything God did for you in your salvation. Let the Holy Spirit overwhelm you with gratitude and joy. Then come back Monday for a story that illustrates all of this.
Yesterday we began a conversation about God’s marvelous work of reconciling us to Himself through Christ’s work on the cross. Here’s how God taught me the the splendor of His work.
God’s Holiness Fought Me – I had to come to a place in my life where I knew that nothing I could ever do or offer to God would be able to change my nature. I had to know that I could never stand in the presence of God based on my qualifications. There can be no salvation from sin and reconciliation to God unless we first see God in His absolute holiness.
God’s Love Sought Me – He sent Jesus to pay the price for my sin – “For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believes on Him should never die, but have eternal life.” (John 3:16) Jesus said, “The Son of Man has come to seek and to save the lost.”
God’s Justice Bought Me – Jesus paid the price for my sin on the cross of Calvary. “You are not your own, you were bought at a price.” (1 Corinthians 6:19-20)
God’s Mercy Caught Me – After the price for my sin had been paid by Jesus, and justice was no longer in the way, mercy came running after me. God chased after me. What an incredible lesson in reconciliation – the One in the right chasing after the ones in the wrong.
God’s Grace Wrought Me – Now that He has caught me, God is shaping me. Every day His grace molds me into the character of Jesus.
God’s Example Taught Me – “He has committed to us the message of reconciliation. We are therefore Christ’s ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us. We implore you on Christ’s behalf: Be reconciled to God.” (2 Corinthians 5:19-20) In the same way that God reconciled me to Himself, I am to go with the Good News and reconcile others to God and to each other.
All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ…
LifeLink Devotional for Wednesday, January 1, 2025
We are more apathetic than we will admit. Especially when it comes to conflict resolution. I know all too well about the “sweep it under the rug” philosophy of problem solving. I grew up in a Scandinavian home. But we’re not the only ones who have adopted and promoted this attitude. Somehow the Biblical admonition to “be at peace with one another” has been misunderstood and misapplied. Being at peace with one another doesn’t mean pretending that the problem never existed. Being at peace means to resolve the problem so that it doesn’t matter anymore. Peace isn’t the burial of issues. Peace is the healing of the pain of issues. But we have been duped into believing that time heals all pain. If we would just set aside our differences for long enough we will eventually forget that they exist. We have become apathetic towards conflict resolution. We have created a false sense of peace based on a wrong understanding of reconciliation.
What if God had done with our sin what we do with the wrongs of others? What hope would we have if God simply swept our sin under the rug and ignored it, hoping that somehow it would go away so that we could relate to Him again? We would have to believe in a less than holy and less than just God. We would even have to minimize His love for us, because true love heals, not hides.
God didn’t hide sin until after it had been justly dealt with. He didn’t offer eternal forgiveness until sin had been publicly paid for. He didn’t provide healing from the pain of sin until it had been openly confessed by the offender. He didn’t invite us to a restored relationship until after the relationship with His Son had been forsaken. He didn’t reconcile us to Himself until He had first reconciled His Son to Himself by raising Him from the dead. He didn’t offer false peace based on ignorance of sin, but rather He offered true peace based on the knowledge and the forgiveness of sin.
2 Corinthians 5:18 “All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ…”
Every necessary requisite to a reconciled relationship with God was initiated and implemented by God. When He saw our sin, He set in motion the strategy of salvation. “He saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit, whom he poured out on us generously through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that, having been justified by his grace, we might become heirs having the hope of eternal life.” (Titus 3:5-7)
When we accept what God did in Christ on the cross, and repent of our sin, our relationship with God is eternally reconciled. He did what I couldn’t. Surrender all your efforts to be made right. Make a clean sweep of the past and accept what Jesus has done for you.
LifeLink Devotional for Tuesday, December 31, 2024
One of the characteristics of reconciliation is restoration. It is difficult for me to consider the validity of anyone saying they have been reconciled to another person unless it includes the marvelous grace of forgiveness leading to restoration of the previous status of the relationship. Restoration to a previous state is not possible unless everything that damaged the relationship is removed and declared irrelevant.
Biblical reconciliation results in the restoration of our relationship with God to a former status. What former status is that? The status of intimate and secure relationship with God based on righteousness. We do not bring our sin with us into this relationship. Reconciliation requires the renouncing of anything that was responsible for the breakup.
There is tension between what the Bible says and what the world says is necessary for reconciliation. The world has declared war on the Biblical definition by stating that the only thing required for people to live in harmony with one another is tolerance. The biblical model of reconciliation challenges that philosophy by emphasizing the need for repentance and change.
In the Bible, reconciliation is all about change. In fact, the Greek word for reconciliation that the Apostle Paul uses in his writings means simply “to change completely”.
There is an ancient and deceptive philosophy called Gnosticism. It teaches that God is only concerned with the spirit and cannot be involved with the physical. That belief is still prevalent today and forms the foundation of the philosophy of tolerance. It is held by those who support and pursue the gratification of the flesh and all its desires. Mainstream culture today believes that people can be reconciled to one another without a change in behavior or beliefs. Logically, then, those same people conclude that the spiritual can also be reconciled to God without change in belief or behavior.
This is contrary to what the Bible teaches about the saving grace of God in Christ Jesus.
2 Corinthians 5:17-19 “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come! All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting men’s sins against them.”
Saved people have the power of the Holy Spirit in them. He is creating the character of Jesus Christ in them. He is moving them toward holiness and the rejection of sinful behavior. True reconciliation with God requires repentance from sin. Unity and harmony with God are not possible when we intentionally continue in what God calls sin and reject the Holy Spirit’s transformational influence.
True reconciliation is based upon and results in change. As our Scripture passage said, every part of our lives that was once connected to and controlled by sin is gone when we are in Christ. We are a new creation, with a new purpose – to do the work of God.
Change. When we repent of our sin, we admit the need for change. God grants forgiveness, and there is a change in our spiritual standing before God. Our change in standing produces a change in our social behavior before man. When we are in Christ, we are to put off all the activity of the flesh so that our lives are lived in righteousness and holiness.
When we come to Christ for salvation, admitting to and repenting of our sinful nature, He changes us. The very life of Jesus Christ is created in us by the power of the Holy Spirit. We are new. Our minds are transformed. Our actions will follow our hearts. We are designed in our salvation to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.
When we repent of our sin and believe in Christ’s righteousness that was made available to us when He paid our sin debt on the cross, we are reconciled to God and restored to our former relationship status. As a result, we renounce sin and live to reflect the glory of our spiritual condition. Then, one day, Jesus will return and finalize the reconciliation when He takes us into His perfect presence.
That’s reconciliation – restoration to God, complete and eternal.
LifeLink 