LifeLink Devotions for Friday, May 17, 2024

In our last devotional we shared the first wisdom principle of good parenting: teach your children respect for authority. Now today we look at principle number two, which is found in Proverbs 13:24.

“He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him.” 

Let me be clearly understood – physical abuse is never justified. However, to swing the pendulum to the other extreme of removing all forms of physical discipline is also deadly. The development of character requires discipline.  So that leads us to our second wisdom principle – There must be discipline for the child to truly know their parents love them.

First of all let’s clarify the distinction between punishment and discipline. Punishment is simply the enforcement of a consequence without concern for the emotional or spiritual needs of the perpetrator. Punishment has no concern with character development. On the other hand, discipline is all about character development, and the physical pain of the consequence is only a means to accomplish maturity. Punishment is not a loving response. Discipline is.

Because we are created in the image of God, we have a basic need to love and be loved. When we feel love, we desire to return love to the one loving us, and the method of returning love that is common to us all is to obey. When there are no rules to obey, there is no way to properly measure love or return love. God created Adam in a perfect love relationship with Himself and gave him a rule to obey to test his love. In parenting, there must be rules and consequences for the child to feel loved and secure. When we withhold discipline, as our Scripture verse for today said, we withhold love. When discipline is inconsistent, the child thinks love is inconsistent. When we discipline, we give the child hope: hope of a fulfilled life and hope that they are both worthy and capable of that life. Proverbs 19:18 says, “Discipline your son, for in that there is hope; do not be a willing party to his death.”

Today, work on turning your emotional responses that produce punishment into loving responses that develop character in your children. Teach them what you want them to learn from the discipline. They will begin to understand how much you love them.

Pastor John